SPWC

I'll start with a quote:
Meredith: "There is a reason I said I'd be happy alone. It wasnt because I thought I would be happy alone. It was because I thought if I loved someone and then it fell apart, I might not make it. It's easier to be alone. Because what if you learn that you need love? And then you don't have it. What if you like it? And lean on it? What if you shape your life around it? And then it falls apart? Can you even survive that kind of pain? Losing love is like organ damage. It's like dying. The only difference is, death ends. This? It could go on forever . . ."
(Grey's Anatomy "Unaccompanied Minor")


People think that you can get over love, that you can stop lovin someone, that love fades away some day, that all you need is someone new and it will all be ok again.
Well... I disagree.
I think that when you love someone, truly love someone you never ever stop lovin them.
You might hate them if they hurt you, you might forget about it for a while, but it will always be a part of you, no matter what.
I think people don't really know what love is, they think that just because they like someone, just because they are attracted to someone, just because they hurt and feel and care and have butterflies, it means that they are inlove.
I think you can have a lot of different kind of feelings to someone, that can be even intense as the real deal, but its still isn't really love.
Love never goes away. you cannot get over love.
You can fall inlove with someone new. you can love more than just one person. but no matter what, the people who you truly whole-heartily loved in the past, will always be a part of you somehow.
Or maybe its just me... maybe i'm the only person in the world that says that if I love someone, its forever.
For better or worse, even if that person no longer loves you back, it doesn't matter, because when you say love forever, I mean love forever.
Maybe I'm crazy, that wouldn't be the first time someone called me that, but I don't like people just saying "I love you" like its just a regular "hi, how are you" sentence.
I think love takes time, I don't think that you can be truly inlove after a month together, even if you are 24/7 with that person, its the beginning, its fun and exciting but its not love.
I'm not saying you can't have real feelings to someone after a short period of time, of course you can, we are not made of stone, I believe there are a few feelings down the road before you actually get to the grand prize which is love.
I do believe that loves takes time, you get to know the person, really get to know them, in good times and bad times and even if you were friends your entire lives, being with someone in a romantic relationship is totally different than being with someone just as a friend.
All the people who break up after a few months, they are sad and depressed and they hate the world and they say that they will never love again and after a few months or even a year, they are just fine, yes, time heals all wounds, but time doesn't make love disappear.
Its ok being ok after a break up and its also ok being not ok after a break up.
Its like if people don't say that they were inlove it makes their relationship less important or something, like their pain isn't real or their hurt is invalidated or something.
We are people, not machines.

The biggest problem is to move on. knowing that this love will be a part of you forever but still move on, try to love again, try to trust someone again. its so hard. so painful. there are so many walls around you and who can really blame you for it?
You make someone your life. you count on him, you trust him, he is your rock. you build your life around his, you start to think about the future, you want what he wants, he is there - always. when you are happy and when you are sad, when you are sick or lonely. he never lets you down... until he does.
How can you possibly continue living your life, when the center of them, the very core of you is no longer there to hold you, to support you, to make you feel like life has meaning?

It is like a piece of you died right along with the betrayal...the only way to get through it is to go through the greiving process. That part of your life has died, and just like losing someone that has died, you will always love them. You just have to learn to let go of them, and the pain (that you are going to associate with them for a long time)...one day at a time. I don't think it will ever actully go away, but the more you try and smile at the good things that are going on around you, the easier it will get. As you heal, you will get stronger and as you grow stronger you will learn more about yourself along the way. You are so right when you say people are not machines...you have to allow yourself to be sad or mad or depressed to get it out of your system that way once you have let go and you feel comfotable, you can break through that brick wall and maybe try and let someone else in. Keep smiling even when you want to punch someone.

You know, its interesting, Ive been inlove before and its been hard as hell when it ended, sometimes it took years before I was able to move on, but I did move on, in the end. part of me still loved them, but I moved on.

The last time I loved someone I thought it was it, that he's the one, not that I believe in the one, but it felt like this is it, the real deal, and it was gone. just like that.

I tried everything, I was alone for a very long time before I tried dating again and it still didn't work out. its been almost 3 years and I do feel like Ive lost someone I loved, like he died in a way, I don't know how to be without him...

I live my life, I go to work, I play with my dog, I pay my bills, I meet my friends, but it all seems so pointless...
of course some days are better than others, but its like a hole was created in me and I just can't fill it up no matter how hard I try...

I guess that is also one of the reasons I really relate to SP's song "my world", I really do feel like everyone I ever counted on ended up leaving me...

I guess at 28 years old, I stopped really believing in happy endings...

(and I'm sorry if i'm being so heavy, I guess I just needed to share)

It's ok, don't worry about it people post their rants and problems all the time.

We're a family, we help each other, I hope you can move on soon and we'll help you through all of it!

When you truly love someone, you would never abandon them. You would be there for them no matter what. You would trust them with your life and lay your life on the line to protect them. When you're not together, you feel like a part of you is missing. This is what it means to love somebody.

I totally agree with what you're saying. It's still hard for me to find some chick that will sweep me off my feet but I do the best and I keep on pushing through. Just remember love comes to those that wait even when they felt like giving up on it. I saw you at the Sick Pups concert in Atlanta! I know that may seem weird but I saw you according to the picture that you took with the Sick Puppies after the concert... that's too cool!!!