uggggh!

[dreamchayser]

Hey all..

I know I'm relatively new to the boards, but you guys just seem awesome... I really don't have anyone in r/l to talk to besides my g/f, and I need advice on my g/f... lol.. ok, here it goes..

We have been best friends for about 6 years now and have been an item for almost a year. She was so supportive of me when I was married to an abusive a**hole of a 'guy', and has been wonderful to me and my daughter. I'm just emotionally drained... I know that she has several medical issues (seizures, lupus, bipolar, depression, etc) and just found out that she hasn't been taking her meds for bipolar and depression... she never told me that her insurance (medicaid) lapsed, so I was under the impression that she was taking them. The past month has been sheer hell... to the point where she asked me to take her to the hospital to be admitted to the psych ward because she was suicidal and was afraid of hurting herself or worse, my daughter. Not intentionally, but she has no control over her actions... I dont know if that is making any sense or not. I know that it's not really her when she's like this, but I'm having such a hard time explaining to her how hard it is for me to act like it doesn't bother me when she starts screaming or crying at me... I love her so much and want her to get the help she needs... it is just so hard for me to comprehend that she's not yelling at me.. I hope I'm making sense. I spent almost 3 years in a marriage where I was screamed at and physically abused, so when she starts to yell, I automatically go back to that time of my life... I'm going to counseling, but I have a long way to go... I just don't know how to tell her that I'm not upset at her, but it takes me a little while to process things and understand that it isn't me causing this. I told her that I will always be there for her and I love her more than she realizes.. I just want her to get the help she needs... at the same time, I don't know what I can do to help her... I feel so helpless.

Ugggh!!!!!!

/end rant.

[decadence21]

That's a pretty tough situation.
I would have to say the first step is to see what you two can do about the insurance deal.
Many people don't realize how important medication can be.
That some people actually NEED it due to a chemical imbalance.

[I have a similar problem with a loved one,
and her not making it a priority to get her meds.
There's an obvious change in character/attitude/actions.]

Give plenty of support and love! Take some time for yourself when needed.
I've found that you can gain strength in knowing there's a little one involved,
and she needs to be loved and protected of course.
Remembering that when times are really tough can help you gain strength for yourself,
and your loved ones.

[dreamchayser]

[decadence21]

Anytime...

Do they not have domestic partner benefits in Maryland?!?!

[dreamchayser]

[Crystal]

Awww, I'm so sorry to hear that you and your partner are stuggling right now. I personally have dealt with some pretty difficult mental and emtional problems as well, so I know how hard they can be.

I'm glad she was able to get a month's worth of medications... After being off for a while, she will have to re-establish the medication level in her body to steady the chemical imbalance. Now you guys are going to have to do some major research on healthcare plan possibilities because when the medication runs out, things will just spiral out of control once again. (Stupid lack of domestic partner benefits... )

And talk to her. Tell her straight up how much you care. That you will be there for her through thick and thin. That you will support her and you will make it through this together. Just be upfront and tell her everything that you want to and need to say to her.

I hope that helps. Feel free to shoot me a PM if you ever need to talk.